The hypochondriac’s guide to convincing yourself you’ve got COVID-19

The hypochondriac’s guide to convincing yourself you’ve got COVID-19

A 35-YEAR-OLD man still wearing the same clothes he wore at university has been named as an icon of sustainable fashion. 

A backlash against fast fashion has seen Nathan Muir, whose newest item of clothing is a Christmas jumper bought eight years ago, recognised by style experts for his capsule wardrobe of just 21 items.

He said: “Apparently I’m at the forefront of ethical fashion because more than half my clothes came free as part of a sports team, business or stag do.

“I also have a fleece gifted me by a corporate sponsor at a work charity run ten years ago, which Stella McCartney complimented personally and which I wear most weekends, evenings and holidays.

“I’ve read that it’s best not to wash fleece fabrics very often as they shed microfibres into the water supply which is another win for me, since I operate a strict sauce-spills-only washing policy for my ‘top layers’.

“Mine isn’t a look you can just ‘get’. If you want to still be wearing T-shirts you were given on university sports tours in 2004, you have to start early.”

Muir’s partner Helen Archer said: “Nathan is the Greta Thunberg of men approaching middle age who can’t be bothered to make any effort.”