Middle-class families panic-buying board games

Middle-class families panic-buying board games

A WOMAN is spending the whole weekend watching what friends and acquaintances are doing this weekend, via her phone. 

Eleanor Shaw began monitoring the weekend activities of others on Friday evening and will continue doing so until late on Sunday, while updating her husband on anything particularly interesting, unusual or downright shady.

She said: “I see Martin and Ruth are on a night out again. They were only out on Wednesday. Checked into three bars and a nightclub. Impressive, really, at their age.

“Mark and Gabby are at some film festival, looks bloody boring. Greg’s on another of his bike rides, without Susan I see, who’s having lunch with someone called Mike. Interesting.

“It’s not stalking, I’m just a social person. I like to see how all my friends, and friends of friends, and old colleagues, and old colleagues’ ex-girlfriends who don’t have private accounts, are spending their time.”

She added: “Nothing from Debbie, or Anna, or Sam. I’m not surprised. They spend all their time snooping into other people’s lives on their phones.”